I have not found that lover yet who always chooses me, and I may never. However, as I was sitting on the back porch of work tonight, watching the lightening light up the sky. I was thanking Jesus that no matter who I am, or where I am in this life, he ALWAYS chooses me. I never have to beg or plead with him to come spend time with me, in fact it is usually the opposite. I never have to ask him if he wants to hang out and than hold my breath for the "actually, I think I would rather hang out with my friends tonight, can we maybe chill tomorrow?" That doesn't happen. He is unconditional, and always faithful. He shows up wether our "lovers" come through for us, and even when they don't. I'm just so grateful for that simple fact. And no matter where my lover decides he wants to be, I will continue to press forward.
I started walking the dog this week. That may seem like a no brainer to most people with pets, however in my world she rarely gets walked. To day is the 4th consecutive day, or maybe the 5th, I can't quite remember. Either way, I started downloading pod casts to listen to along the way. At first I downloaded them from my church, (Substance church) and than I went ahead and subscribed to my old church (Eagle brook church.) And now I genuinely can't get enough of them that I went ahead and googled other pod casts. I can start out on these walks feeling sluggish and I'm usually mulling over ALLLLLL of the stuff I "should" be doing instead of walking, and than after a couple minuets my spirit starts soaking up this "quiet" time and I find myself smiling and am filled with peace. It's crazy how that happens. Every pod cast that I listen to I find myself wishing that Bryan would have been right there listening to it with me. It's a weird concept, but it's hard for me to want to "grow" without him, because i want him so badly to "grow" himself. I love him with all of my heart, but I genuinely wonder what the future holds for us most day's.
So tonight as I was staring out at the sunset watching that lightening, I decided in my heart that I am not going to stop my life for things that should no longer surprise me. I am going to continue to press forward, and trust that "God is never early, and he's never late, he is ALWAYS RIGHT ON TIME."
I wish there was a way to link a certain pod cast onto here for you, this women's story genuinely touched my life. But until I can figure out if that is an option or not, I will just post the name of the pod cast, and the title of the speaker. Look it up on i-tunes, i've listened to it twice now.
The podcast is called: FEED MY SHEEP
and the title of the actual one to listen to (it should be towards the top of the list) is called "FINDING GOD'S LOVE IN AMERICA."
It is the story of this polish women who came to america around 1919. SO BEAUTIFUL!
Before I leave you tonight, I would like to share with you my new favorite item. :)
http://www.amazon.com/Generation-Newest-Version-Leather-Vangoddy/dp/B002SW5QAW/ref=sr_1_7?ie=UTF8&s=electronics&qid=1281840555&sr=8-7
I ordered a light blue i-touch case off amazon. I LOOOOOVE IT. It encloses my I-pod so that when i throw it in my purse or *cough couch* drop it at the "gym," the screen wont get ruined!
Now I just need to get a new camera case. :)
Hope you are all having wonderful weekends. Praise the lord for one more day a-comin!!
sleep well beauties,
Ciao~
I
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